@J Money BS: Great. My Witness Relocation Program rep is totally getting a piece of my mind tonight.

And yet Raab, wonderful writer that he is, isn't nearly as relevant these days without his role as the prophet Abraham, ceaselessly railing against LeBron's King Nimrod.

@Phintastic: I just checked Wikipedia, and apparently OT consists of the captains from each team making nasty comments about each other behind their backs. First one to cry loses.

Imagine if Federer refused to play Nadal, and you'll have some idea of the hole that's been left in the sport — one that is perpetually struggling for relevance.

Isn't about time Tom Cable made his way back to the firing list? I'd say Oakland's brief tryst with relevance is nothing but a fond memory for me now.

@Powersurgeon: Carry on then.

@JOHNballstotheWall: But say hi to Mr. Russell first.

@Powersurgeon: If Gruden coasted on Dungy's work in Tampa, then shouldn't he at least be credited for Callahan taking the Raiders to the Super Bowl the same year?

Any chance they can write future Heat Stroke entries, or whatever the fuck those long-ass basketball pieces are called here?

Months before my son was born I had this scene in my head of me gently singing the Beatles' "Blackbird" while he drifted off to sleep thinking I was the best father ever. Problem is, it's an exceedingly short song and there's no way I'm gonna repeat it 20 times while I wait for him to fall asleep. So like the huge…

If my old friends JaMarcus and Todd Marinovich don't stop by the top 50, there is no justice.

Dong. Just dong. Pick any variety.

Slap a Giants helmet on that thing, and then we're talkin'.

@I Like Cheap Beer: And half of that was Blanda.

@Clamps: Seriously - I mean, Dustin Hoffman in Star Wars?

@vodkanaut: My memory of that time, faulty as it is, is that once the Patrick/Olbermann team became stars the rest of the roster scrambled to emulate them. But too many of them focused on the quips and overlooked the fact that the Big Show was more than just zingers. If Patrick & Olbermann became the Eddie Van Halen…

That's the first time I've ever thought to shave my pubes like Moe. And is that some kind of root system there?

I must protest Art Shell's inclusion on this list. Yes, his 2nd go-around sucked balls but he did take the Raiders to the conference championship. Of course they got completely castrated by the Bills and never recovered, but...

Have you ever been typing so fast that you don't take your finger off the "Shift" key in time and end up with the first two letters of words capitalized by accident?? I'm a really fast typer and this happens to me all the time. The first word of this E-Mail was originally "HAve." I didn't notice it until just now.…

@Always Winning: I'll get a Diet Coke, so it's all good.