Other than finding a few impersonations funny, Elvis has never interested me in the slightest.

Far more decapitations and a shaker of rape.

Didn't you hear? They're going for more diversity this time. Naked purple bodies.

You lousy corksuckers. You have violated my fargin rights.

Turns out it's just another cheap VR title where people fart in your face.

TAKE MY MONEY

Loving Hot Lips' hair. Damn.

Always.

Well, hey - there's still six more Dunk & Egg stories that Martin will never write. Maybe the good female characters are in there.

Looking forward to the straight spinoff starring Scarlett: GI JOI.

I caught GI Joe: Retaliation on cable this weekend and I was quite pleasantly surprised to find that nah I'm just fucking with you it was predictably terrible.

A hundred Boston cops opening fire at once and hitting everything in a quiet Watertown neighborhood but the Tsarnaevs' car doesn't quite constitute an action scene.

More like LaPoop.

You see mom, when two groups hate each other very much, they share a very special hug called a race war…

They basically review it every week, only in the Newswire rather than TV Club.

They're just temporarily embarrassed white men.

But he tells it like it is!

What are those?

Goddammit.

Given what I posted, it is very strange that you think I've got a stockpile of Pacificos.