Yeah, shooting prairie dogs is not that strange if you live in farmland.

Shooting prairie dogs isn’t actually that strange. I grew up in MT and my grandfather would shoot them on our family farm. He even tried to teach us how to hunt them. Cows and horses will step in their burrow holes and end up breaking their legs and having to be put down. They are considered a pest to farmers. Not…

So.....

He ran for office four times, despite being called Sphincter.

And yet, when he opens his mouth, a stream of shit comes out, so...life imitates fart, I guess.

Even when American runners didn’t end up on the podium in international meets, I always took pride in the nasal bone strength they displayed during competition. Now, I realize that was all a lie. I don’t know what to believe in anymore.

When the inevitable press release comes out in 20 minutes stating that the NFL has been hacked and never actually said any of this, you are going to feel really gullible for having believed it.

“Could I get 5 three-minute sessions instead?” You really need some representation brah

I guarantee one of these dumb ass glowing orbs will be in the Oval Office by the end of the month.

I’m so mad that I get this reference.

Also enraged was his other brother Dirrell.

God I am going to get tore up for saying this on Deadspin, but Al Qaeda actually started one of those wars.

Obviously you didn’t go to Harvard. If you’d went to Harvard (like Tampa Bay quarterback Ryan Fitzpatrick) you’d know that you don’t fight land wars in SE Asia.

That picture only has one thumb visible, so I can only assume the other is safely lodged in its favorite home: his asshole.

Q: What has two thumbs, is a graduate of the Harvard Business School, started America’s two longest wars, and still might not be the worst republican President of the 21st century?

he doesn’t need probation or counseling, he needs a doctor - dude was clearly having a stroke.

Is your racist, shit-for-brains uncle smart?

Stupid.

Self promotion doesn’t require very much intelligence, especially if you have no scruples or self doubt to get in the way. Plus many years of practice, and starting out with a ton of money and business connections from daddy certainly helps too.

A baby bird in the nest that opens its brightly-colored mouth and makes a peep sound will be fed by its parents. It will continue doing this until it is a fully grown bird. Meanwhile, a baby bird that does not do this will starve to death.