I'm not a fan of bigger phones because I pretty much exclusively wear jeans and want something that comfortably fits in my pocket. But, I'm curious—those of you who got a new iPhone today, what are your thoughts?

Actually I wouldn't know how good our dishwasher was since, unless it was a holiday or something, my sensible Irish Catholic mother expected us to wash our dishes at once instead of filling up the giant, stupid comes-with-every-80s-house dishwasher like lazy fucking idiots. But you know … you do you.

Martha was convicted of obstruction of justice, because she lied to investigators about insider trading, which was pretty bad. The fact that she did her time and was a good sport about it reflects well on her though.

And you speak in cliches.

I'm explaining to you why dishwashers are stupid. You're the one who inexplicably wants two of them.

You basically have to half-wash a dish before putting into a dishwasher. Then you have to fill the dishwasher before running it. Then you have to run it, and then you have to unload it. This sounds a lot more labor-intensive than washing a dish in the sink.

Whatever?

Oh please. Nine year old kids can catch the bus, walk to school, go to the shops to get the bread mom forgot. And cook. I did the baking as my mother declared she didn't do baking cakes or cookies. So I did. There's a big difference between military guns and doing normal ordinary things, like walking to school.…

That's where my parents went wrong? I walked to school by myself way too early! I see it all so clearly now!

Yeah, pretty much all I care about is whether it tastes good or not. I doubt that strawberry Skittles contain any actual strawberry in them, and that's okay with me

I don't think they spent one millisecond considering the risks. They were probably too busy coming up with clever captions to the photos they planned on posting to social media

Is there a difference between a great astrologer and a terrible astrologer? Like obviously you can't compare the accuracy because it's always going to be zero for any astrologer.

lulz the best is this one:

That's not why we know you're an asshole.

Yeah, I only follow the very best astrologers.

If you have an interest in astrology, this explanation of why it works is really fascinating. It's about eight minutes long, but genuinely worth your time.

Those people should be more pissed at themselves for spending money on that shit.

i would slaughter billions of people to have first class seats. this sounds so much easier. and harder. because faking confidence is not my bag.

thanks. but...

Yeah, I don't wish a gory end for her. I do take comfort in the fact that eventually her mind (and all like it) will utterly cease to exist. Of course that happiness is tempered by the fact that every other mind will eventually be annihilated as well, but I like to focus on the bright side.