You gotta get right, son.

This is good. And you should feel good.

I barely read that quote and I KNOW I would have immediately replied with, “Well I need to see your ID and talk to your Manager to make sure that you actually work here.”

Goddammit

I was 16 and playing Junior A in Canada when somehow during a line brawl I ended up paired against the current toughest guy in the league. That is exactly what I ended up doing to him, as I had never been in a hockey fight before and I was scared shitless. He collapsed to the ice and I was taken to the penalty box,…

I’m more concerned about the conversation with the wife off the air.

Comments are a hoax.

The “vanity six” are for sure...veneers at the least but there are no gaps and the gums are ungoldly perfect in color...I’m thinking implant bridge. Very rare for someone her age, but who knows how bad they may have been?

She doesn’t know because she can’t feel it...quite convinced those are not real.

Having worked in the cosmetic dental industry, albeit for only a clouple of years, and taking a close look at these pictures...I am 90% convinced these are not real teeth.

I hope he gets well soon. We need more Festus for the rest of us...

Those great big stupid oil can tailpipe things

Having to do that took all the fun out of it didn’t it...

He’s somehow managed to still stay even 1% relevant and the only thing that will end him is to say the one thing that will bury him and quite possibly bury him deeper than he could ever imagine....and that’s who he actually voted for. That said, I think his non-answer represents the 14minute and 59 second mark of…

Oh yeah? Well I once dated a girl who tried to slide into first and ended up getting punched out at third.

My Dog, Dex...when I ask him “OoozagooboI? OOOZAGOOBOI??!!

This video was the equivalent of watching a video titled, “Ten Clever Uses for a Hockey Stick” and then watching a 4 minute video of a hockey game.

SARAH JESICA PARKER LOOKS LIKE A HORSE!

Why would she? Don’t you? Are you serious? If you blindly retweet things to your Twitter without checking the source...you’re an idiot. You could be being trolled or you could be retweeting a fucking white supremacist. Get real. You work in goddamn WHITE HOUSE!

It’s this simple...if a tiny little woman shoves you and you knock the fuck out of her...you’re basically the same as the guy who shoots a kid in the back because he was running through your yard.