I rented a DCT equipped M3 once, thinking “this will be fun.” I don’t think I got to spend more than 30 seconds of uninterrupted “spirited” driving, but I did get to spend half an hour trying to figure out how to put the car in park (I was in a cell phone dead zone so I couldn't Google)

One massive problem: The CTS V (yes. V. Not V-sport. V. As in “I am a Z06 with 4 doors”) costs $85,990 (gas guzzler tax and destination fee included in that price).

But can you feel the Ecoboost? You can certainly feel it on the BMW 4 cyl, with its jarring engine start/stop letting the world know how much you’re sacrificing to be Eco, before boosting away with “240” horsepower.

Can we shame “piano black” next? Might as well call it “glossy dust and fingerprint highlighter.”

I’ve never taken my car drag racing so if you want to, you can say that your Hummer has performed better on the track than a car that carries less than 11 lbs/hp.

That’s bullshit. If you want to make VW offer the recall because it’s a thing that will cost them money and be newsworthy as part of their punishment fine, but don’t force people to take it.

Barring VW dropping a brand new engine into the cars, there’s no way that an owner wants to get this recall, right?

It’s not really an M3/4 fighter. I mean it is in size (it's actually significantly lighter and looks smaller), but this thing is going to be a 6 figure car. It’s in a class of 1 right now.

I need an LT1 powered wagon. I’d settle for either an updated SS sedan or ATS V-sport (less hardcore than the V but V8 powered).

Why The Toyota Prius' Face is the Toughest Challenge Yet!

Pretty car, but bad road trip car. A used S550 would’ve fit that category better. Buy this Maserati instead of another low-mileage M3 lease, and really impress your coworkers at your midlevel finance job.

My Brembos are gray.

If you're really happy about your car's reliability in the first 15,000 miles, you've bought an unreliable car.

“We don't have it yet, but... well it's on the way." Well, I'm not, jackass.

Don’t get me wrong, the car can enter a corner at speeds that would make most M-cars jealous. It just doesn’t do silly things on the way out. You can probably force a ridiculous slide, but it’s not as easy as “mash the accelerator to create smoke.”

It’s pretty hard to get the 320 hp v6 ATS to do anything loud and dramatic. It’s really grounded to the ground.

How’s the steering? How’s the ride? If the suspension is adaptive, how do the modes feel? How do the pieces of the car you touch feel (steering wheel, buttons, paddles, leather, etc)?

Ok, sneaking one more in, because Wikipedia says production started in 2009, even if it’s a 2010 model

That thing is evil looking. I love it.

If we’re using the whole millennium, sure. The car doesn't qualify for the 00s decade, though. Hell, it doesn't even qualify for sexy cars up through 2015.