“We should not be teaching children, period, how to have sex.”

“A magazine should not be a girl’s first exposure to anal sex, that’s a priest’s job.”

Do you want toilet babies? Because not teaching kids about reproduction and safe sex is how you get toilet babies.

Hey now, the New York Times could have scooped Deadspin, but the copydesk had a major blow up about whether it was double handjob, double hand-job, or double handjobs since it was more than one.

I was this close to exposing that guy until you published this article.

No shit I don’t get it. That’s why I said I don’t get it.

Found one! 166 to go.

Wow, that’s horrible.

I still love this one where the NYPD was trying to kettle Broadway Bomb skateboarders with very little luck...

JOKE EXPLANATION FOR THE YOKEL (cue “Spanish Flea”)

*stamps WHO WATCHES THIS off Commentariat Bingo Card*

Yes it was.

Watched the draft for the first time last night and one thing I will say: seems a bit anticlimactic to announce the No. 1 pick first, at the start of the show. They should start at the end of the second round and run the draft backwards, to build suspense.

Are you really surprised? They’re nuts up there, which is why they have this lunatic as their congressman. SMH.

excuse me, sir EXCUSE ME, have you heard about [school i attended or am a fan of]?

Well this means it’s Friday. On to the weekend.

My favorite part was when the bear didn’t give a fuck.

Also enraged was his other brother Dirrell.