I’m sorry, but Halloween is shaping up to be yet one more lame Halloween sequel. You’re telling me they let an outside third party go into an asylum for the criminally insane and show a serial killer the mask he wore while he was doing his killings? ohhkay. And the prison transfer—is that successful or not? And you…

Do you know about his new movie, Mandy, with Nic Cage?  It’s my most anticipated release of the year, the trailer is the best trailer in a decade.

So it’s Beyond the Black Rainbow except it actually has a plot?

Lady, it’s called MAKEUP. Did you also get fired up when Old Deuteronomy has his CATS face applied?

Jurassic World 2, which is SO fucking dumb—

Hate to break it to you bub, but if you think Annihilation is dumb, that means YOU’RE dumb.  Because it’s pretty smart.

UGH, will the fucking superhero shit EVER end?

This is fucking stupid.  Everyone knows that Coco Pebbles make the best milk.  I can only assume you left it out of your stupid contest because you knew it would make it NO CONTEST.

Don’t blame R. Patts at all.  The ring through the nose looks fun from a distance, but you can’t only date Ferdinand the Bull for so long.

As a parent of two young kids who ask me for sweet treats all day long everyday, I have to tell them the reason they can’t have a SECOND Popsicle is because it’s filled with sugar. What other reason is there to deny them? I’m not doing it because I’m worried about them getting fat, but I want them to learn the…

Sure, but which one could fuck you until you started speaking spanish?

Don’t like a movie so I’m sour? Okay.

Nope, but I will take a James Gunn-directed GotG3, thanks.

Showed his penis and the Hollywood lesbian mafia took him down.  Thank god Trump has made it okay again to hang dong.

Just goes to show how little the Avengers movies have stuck with me.

I’m sorry, but A4 is a dour slog. These guys did a fine job with Cap 2, but I’d rather watch Thor 3 or GotG2 1000 times before I watch Thanos again.

I don’t know who you are, but you’re my idol.

Haha! Actually the signs (which appeared only in the first half of 1991) said “This Summer, We’re a Hormonal Tragedy!”

“It shows an entire respectable upper-class society that’s brutally, psychopathically unconcerned with anything other than maintaining power and keeping up appearances.”

“It’s the summer of 1991 in Cape Cod, a hormonal tragedy crudely destined to end in the billion-dollar biblical cataclysm of Hurricane Bob.”