I can finally get my super powers!

Why are people still trying to make CROCS a thing?

I know two in my group of friends who are going for Most Insufferable Vegan.

Its ok, I didn’t either.

Wait, you’re fine with that terrible vile mayo substance yet balk at the delicious mushroom?

Use pets, that’s why they’re there.

Self hatred is often a difficult thing to come to terms with, so many people just don’t.

Ah hell I forgot about this!

I’ll take it as soon as I can use in-game money for a IRL haircut.

At this rate, each new fighting game will feature all bald characters wearing trash bags before unlocks are purchased.

Aren’t these the guys that brick their own refurbs?

Aren’t these the guys that brick their own refurbs?

The only thing better than bacon is everything cooked in bacon grease.

This is easy— if you can’t see any part of the bagel through the cream cheese when looking top-down you’re using too much.

EDIT: Eh nevermind, I missed that

You betcha the manager gets an earful whenever she’s around.

If they have to potentially retry all these cases, can they not retroactively take back her pay from the last 7-8 years too? Seems like a fitting restitution.

This is the one true take.

I say the same whenever I walk into a restaurant while smoking a cigarette.

What kind of a self-hating jerkbeast does this to a CHILD?

Precisely. Unless your drink is filled to the brim you don’t have anything to worry about.