He called you on the bone phone, but you didn’t answer.

My wife dreamt the other night that she caught me in bed with a really sweet girl from her high school. Mind you, I have zero interest in sexual partners outside our marriage of tweny-plus years. She was still pissed at me for two days.

LOL.

Swear to Gawd, you’re such a crazypants.

I can’t even snark them.

That is not ironic.

lol

I am terribly sorry for your loss.

One word: taser.

Tell her that she will cease to exist and that her body will become worm food. I mean, that’s what you believe, right?

Archie was boring in the 70s, I doubt he’s going to be interesting this time around

Probably brain damage from the marihuana. Or associating with jazz musicians.

Letting people know the dangers of marihuana.

Sort of like your girlfriend.

Marihuana kills more people every year than automobile collisions.

It’s not about you, Pinkham.

Yes and yes.

This probably would have been interesting two years ago.

You suck diseased donkey balls.

You’re a little CareBear!