My son comes home from a fancy Mississippi college and I'm horrified to find he's a nerd.

Hollywoo Stars and Celebrities: How Will They Die? Will Sharks Eat Them? Let's Find Out!

"Comedy Central Uk" sounds more disgusted at its own exsistance than distinguished.

Donald Trump loves that dinner theater place with the little wines and the Christ cakes.

There's been like 15 of these obituaries in the past few days, and I feel bad for not knowing any of these people. It feels like when the camp was raided in LOST and all the background people died at once.

Tetris, Tetris, Tetris. What ever happened to unicycle? Or the ball?

Whenever I'm at work doing menial tasks, which is all the time, a random Playlist of nearly every song and commercial jingle I've ever heard plays in my head. Some of the most frequently played are from Super Mario World, Mario 64, and Super Mario Land. I'm actually stuck right now; the theme for the first world of…

He was the leader of Jesse's support group when he was trying to get clean. Not exactly a major role, but I remember it because having him in a support group is practically a reference to Dear John.

There's now multiple generations of people who grew up doing impressions of these characters. They should find one of them, like that Filipino kid Journey found who sounds exactly like Steve Perry. Just seems like a better approach than, "Hey, Steve, can you do the Muppet News Guy?"
"Not really."
"Eh, screw it. Who…

When this giant picture of Gonzo showed up on my newsfeed, my first thought was "Shit, Dave Goelz died?" All these R.I.P. Newswires have me jumpy.

So, Mr. Mouse. You say you want to divorce your wife because she's crazy?
I didn't say she's crazy. I said she's fucking Goofy!

Hmm…Have you tried tightening the belt a notch, or being the singer from INXS?

I don't know about social suicide. Maybe social auto-erotic asphyxiation.

He was in Breaking Bad for chrissakes.

Jere Burns: As a matter of fact, as I recall, last time we met, you told me next conversation we had wasn't gonna be a conversation.
Kermit: This is a different conversation.

And now, A Completely Unnecessary Anecdote:

Other than the wrong-sounding Muppets and the new pig's disturbing eyes (which, yes, look like Miss Piggy's original eyes but are nonetheless disturbing)…I liked this.

Ugh.

Maybe he doesn't talk at all, just waits until someone asks "Spirit, who's lonely grave is this?" Then he says "Why, YOURS, Ebenezer, the richest man in the cemetary! Haw haw haw haw!"
That opportunity probably wouldn't present itself very often, though. Jesus, that was terrible. I'm really tired. Sorry. Goodnight,…

Kinda. Album art that's not created specifically for the album would usually be rights-managed, which costs more, but means no one else can use that image. Shutterstock, I believe, is royalty free. So anyone can buy that same image and use it however and wherever they want, even if it's already a "famous" album cover.