I haven't seen The Goldbergs, but I'm guessing it's about a professional wrestler and an eyebrowless comedienne playing Mouse Trap.

Norm MacDonald: And in music news, number one on the college charts this summer was "Better than Ezra." And at number two…"Ezra."

Bull Moose Party all the way!

Next time on Great Job, Internet! : a mashup of Cleavon Little riding off into the sunset as "Don't You Forget About Me" plays in the distance.

As silly as , say "We love Lincoln! And the flag of the traitor that killed him!"?

There used to be a graying tower alone on the sea…

Come on, did no one here have the Playback boxed set? That thing was the shit.

I was hoping the payoff was gonna be

I would say to people who honestly want to keep the flag that they should reappropriate it. There's nothing inherently racist about a some stars in a blue x on a red field. Just declare that while it was once a symbol of slavery, segregation and bigotry, now it will be a beacon of freedom, and all who see it know they…

But you can call him Moon Pie.

I don't know. I was trying to think of a joke, but was drawing a blank, so I just Googled "dumbest joke" and stopped when one made me laugh like an idiot.

Suit yourself, I'm easy. What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?

Could you describe the ruckus, sir?

Answer: They didn't think of it at all. Just like there's a healthy contingent of Republicans, which apparently includes my father-in-law, who believe the political parties never swapped ideologies, meaning they can somehow still claim to be "the party of Lincoln" and fly the flag that was in direct opposition to not…

Working in retail, you get to periodically hear a 30 second clip of Kid Rock's song about the old days, listening to "Tom Petty on the radio" and how he wishes he could go back in time. I think it's called "Uncle Rico." Anyway, I wonder if now he wishes he could go back in time and change the channel, what with Tom…

How can this kind of influence be healthy? Five minutes with these long-haired misanthropes and Archie is already wearing ripped dungarees like a common hoodlum.

"Only the second-greatest director OF ALL TIME!" - @UweBollRaw

Spike Lee angrily steals 80s film legend F. Murray Abraham's kidneys.

Kirk Cameron Sucked A Male Crockoduck's Dick
By Wesley Willis

Every one of these sounds like a Wesley Willis song.