I can't do it. Even after getting banned for life for pointing out John Cheese frequently mentions he used to be an alcoholic, I still read it every day. I occasionally learn something, so it's justified.

That reminds me…Cracked articles. They used to be interesting and/or funny, but for the past few years I find myself reading them purely out of habbit. I keep going there every day, thinking "maybe today Seanbaby will finally post something" but it's always some "mind-blowing" crap and wave after wave of photoplasties.

In all this time, how has there never been a Violent J/Silent Bob mashup? Come on internet. Two bearded fat guys…this thing writes itself.

I wouldn't speak to him, either. It's professional Juggalo porn or nothing.

Fun fact: Despite hearing it countless times for 30 years, it wasn't until I watched The Departed with captions on that I realized she was singing "rape, murder" in Gimme Shelter.

Finally, it pays to be poor! I watch all tv through my 360. Yahoo, Netflix, Amazon, Hulu, and HBO Go(thanks, mom!) The few shows that don't show up on any of the above (current seasons of The Walking Dead or Doctor Who for example) I buy for $2.99. Suck it, Comcast. Except I still need you for internet, so…just the…

I don't know about slave owners, but I think there were Southerns who helped slaves escape to the North. Just like I'm pretty sure only a tiny fraction of the world's 1.57 billion Muslims are terrorists. Also, did you know that not every German in WWII was a Nazi? There were like 17 attempts on Hitler's life, by…

"Sweet Home Alabama" was not written to defend segregation! It's more about being proud of where you come from, warts and all (hence the three "boo"s after "in Birmingham they love the governor.") More to the point, Ronnie Van Zant didn't think it was fair for (his friend!) Neil Young to indict the entire South for…

If you have an Xbox, there's a Yahoo Screen app so you can watch Community on TV like in days of old. If you have a Playstation, you're shit out of luck, which is kinda weird, because isn't Communuty produced by Sony? You'd think there would be company synergy.

He looks like someone just told him how magnets work.

Hot power yoga? He's just throwing a bunch of words together, right?

There must be a road somewhere in Kansas where all the East coast brands are on one side of the street, and the West coast brands on the other. Staring each other down, like the 38th parallel.

Crap. I forgot which one had the unnecessary letter.

See also: Eddy's/Dryer's ice cream

He doesn't need to. Wasn't Bull abducted by aliens?

Her melanin is invisible.

Kids today don't appreciate what they have. We didn't have Jennifer Lawrence growing up. We had Joey Lawrence, and he was terrible.

For me it's "Lake Placid," a pretty great dark comedy advertised as a generic monster/ horror movie.

The biggest difference is Joss' version removed all the 70's era sexism.

It just seems like all anyone ever talks about is Netflix. I use both, plus Hulu and my mom's email for HBO Go. Amazon has pretty good exclusives; as you said, the Americans and Hannibal, and I'll add Orphan Black. But unless I'm watching one of those specific shows, I put on Netflix. Their libraries and new releases…