I agree! I’ve been shaving for years now. I’d rather be bald and not he’s-not-fooling-anyone mostly bald.

Boy I hope so!

I’ll have to ask my Uncle when he visits next month. From Germany. He’s an engineer. Software. I wouldn’t call him humorless, unless we discount schadenfreude as a valid form of humor.

He’s so full of shit it’s sometimes hard to believe he’s real. I see him on the news and I’m like...no, really....seriously?

Hornets aren’t much fun either! Stung 3 times in my life, hornets each time. Only once did I deserve it. I was 7. Throwing rocks at the hive seemed like fun...

They definitely are! And so fragile, nowadays. Cheap. The ink costs more than the printer.

When I was 10 years old my babysitter also worked at the drive-in movies. She'd bring us a huge bag of popcorn now and then. Mmm. Popcorn.

And free...free the fries, man.

Way back in the long long ago (OK, 1989-91) I worked as a computer operator when that was still a thing. Well, it wasn't so much but it was an old company. There was a printer that printed a few thousand customer statements for the retail wing of the company twice a month on weekends. For some reason, it wouldn't work…

Wait, I double majored in English and Philosophy and I turned out...

No apology needed, it's what we all were thinking. Good rant.

*much applause*

Yes, they all seem to go for the same model of nose...

My life is much richer for having known her. Truly.

My ex gf is apparently still there and she’s been dead for 2 years now. I won’t check. Too sad, you know? The world is a less smiley place without her.

More like someone who wishes he was a vampire, thinks the name makes him sound evil/powerful, and is the lowest form of pathetic in reality.

It was crazy,” said Kori Houser, whose toddler Chase picked up only three eggs. “Adults were trampling over us.”

I’m edging toward it looking arrogant, uncaring. Tough call for their legal team I guess.

I liked her old nose. Maybe I’m just sentimental.

I just um...wow. That’s almost Ozzy in the War Pigs video level of intoxication.