I definitely cried. It was a great game and an absolutely amazing moment on the mound with all their jerseys, even without all the contrived statistical anomalies. Leave it to baseball to take a great emotional moment and try to make it better with math.

But I would argue that it’s not that new of a concept. The Heat certainly weren’t the first.

But that’s just this year! That’s my point. Free agency means it could be a different group next year!

This is but the signal of a complete culture shift away from team loyalty. It represents the looming death of my father’s generation of complainers who deride “selfish” athletes and long for the (boring) days of yore when players stayed with one team for their entire career. The NBA is wide open as soon as each…

Still better than the mayor of Seattle. 

Whether this makes the Rockets an insanely entertaining unstoppable force after they change their gameplan or it’s a complete nuclear disaster that blows up... I’M SO EXCITED!!!

Those poor Thunder fans, though. 

The real story here is the depressing state of Vrabel’s broken marriage.

The only thing worse than racism is racist Triscuits.

Yes.

No, I am a family cracker! Triscuits are Hitler’s manna.

I’m clearly talking about regular flavor Triscuits. And if they need something on top of them to make them palatable, they are garbage.

Please step into my bathroom.

So “racism is fine” a better opinion than “Triscuits suck.” I’m calling the police.

How does he feel about the anthem? What about the Little Mermaid casting? What about Triscuits?! I need his opinion on Triscuits!

(Anybody who replies to this with that Ron Burgundy “that escalated quickly” meme will be shot through my bathroom door.)

I tried a similar move over one of those big concrete Kit Kat bar-shaped things in front of my parking spot. It didn’t go well. I had to have both legs amputated just below the knee. Then I murdered my girlfriend through a bathroom door in South Africa.

How long will this sale go on? I can’t find information on that.

How long will this sale go on? I can’t find information on that.

I’ve asked you repeatedly not to refer to my wife and children that way.

WHY DO THEY STILL MAKE BLACK HIGHLIGHTERS?!?!