My sister's boyfriend called me last week to ask my permission to propose. He's a sweet guy, and I know they'll be very happy, but my honest reaction was 'She's 34- the only permission you need is hers!'

My wife and I originally wanted two children. My wife had a difficult pregnancy (baby's fine and healthy), but the medical issues that came up made it very clear this is our one and only child unless we adopt. Even some of the people that know the whole story are still trying to convince us to have additional…

At the rate he's going, this might be Coach Hunter's fate if his team gets to the Championship Game:

Some of my favorite quotes from the crazy bitch upstairs three apartments ago:

Gotta admire the long-con.

Less hilarious is when I listened to a neighbor scream, "FUCK YOU, JESSICA! FUCK YOU FOR DOING THIS TO ME, YOU FUCKING BITCH!" for three straight hours until the cops came and Jessica answered the door and said that the yelling was coming from a TV show. He shut up after that, though.

Well if he's screaming in the hallway, unless there's like 6 inches of cork in all the walls, people are going to hear that.

That's pretty amazing, but I would HATE living there. I don't want to hear my neighbors' business.

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Here is a lewd pic to test out on sext bot

Felt that way after Cobain. Couldn't even listen to Nirvana for a long time. I'll watch this for sure, but yeah. Maybe not right away.

Don't you even fricking say that. It will come true and I will jettison myself into the god damn Sun.

The movie gets a D+, but Hugh Jackmans hair has to get an A+, right?

Ok, WBC. Sure.