Oh fine I guess as the resident jacked vegan I’m going to have to chime in. Ugh.

My natural sleep rhythm feels nothing but disdain for everything you’ve written. I am the mom in this gif now.

The only problem with your plan is waking up at the asscrack of dawn.

Jew here. I have no clue what these categories are supposed to be. The two main subsets of Jewish ethnicity are Ashkenazi (whiter-looking northern European style Jews) and Sephardic (browner-looking Mediterranean/middle-Eastern style Jews). How those would map to Hebrew/Israelite/Jew, ya got me.

Never underestimate Virginia. They throw people in jail for speeding. 

The change is what pays for the golf bags.

Came here to mention the Superamerica. Needs more stars!

Repeal the second amendment. Problem solved. 

I’m 37 and I get weekend delivery of the Washington Post. Not because I actually read it, but because my wife for whatever reason enjoys lounging with a physical newspaper on the weekend. I was willing to sign up for it because it also includes a digital subscription.

So many cars’ infotainment screens are so bad, regardless of whether their UIs are pretty, that I would happily take something boring and plain that just fucking works over something with a bunch of slick graphics that’s too complicated to figure out, or is otherwise aggravating to operate.

Run-flat tires are such garbage. 

Less unsprung weight and rotational mass is good all the time, not only on a track.

A CRX is far from a Camry. Repent, ye heathen!

Well right, point being that it's no *newer* than a 2003, and could be older.

The guys saying they’d love to be complimented on their looks are probably undeserving of compliments.

There’s a guy at my gym who drives an old 1st-generation Lexus RX300, so the newest it could be is a 2003. He mentioned recently that he takes it to the Lexus dealer for service because he likes to get new Lexuses as service loaners. I was like, “man, you must really like those service loaners because on an old car…

The massage example isn’t an exact analog but it’s got some similarities.

This ain’t debate club, pal. 

Galt is commonly thought of as coming from Atlas Shrugged and the fact that you’re referring to something else doesn’t change much else.