That's actually a better, more succinct pitch than half of the real ones out there. There are basically two types: ones like your hypothetical, which are "I'm an artist and would like to make a creative endeavor; help give me the funds with which to do it and reap the rewards of the endeavor"; and much more vague…

And now he's doubling down: http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/post-pol…

She has plaster farther up inside her than gynecologists ever go, and you're fixated on her FEET?

My old school knee-jerk "UGH WHY IS THIS NEWS" reaction reared its ugly head and I made that face you always make when one of your parents calls and asks you "did you see the outfit that Miley Cyrus is wearing in her music concert?"

Very true. I'd like to think that you *can't* fake a trombone performance like that. Also, the difference between an indoor concert and an outdoor stadium event is huge.

Y'all might not do it anymore, but when you hosted Super Bowl XXXVI and the Boston Symphony were part of the halftime show, volunteers were tossing that "Steinway grand" around like a beachball.

If it turns out that this is another halftime show like the Superbowl where all the instrumentalists are actually miming and the "piano" is really made of styrofoam, please don't tell me. I'll be so heartbroken.

Been there. In fact, AM there. Sigh.

I would pay to see that movie. Or opera. Or ice dance routine.

Or a video camera. If there ever was a time for the local tv news stations to get a few ratings points by organizing a public shaming, this would be it.

The real problem in my town is that we were supposed to get rain until late tonight, when it would switch to snow. NO ONE TOLD THE SNOW THIS. It started at 1pm, was very thick, and now a lot of our major streets look like they're competing for Best Impression of Atlanta Done By a New England State.

That looks less like a grill and more like a half-chewed mouthful of froot loops. Ugh.

I just applaud Wayne's decision that the rhyming first and last name schtick should end with his generation.

I demand mounted moose units!

You have a lifelong fear of clowns and people in masks, and you got front row tickets to Cirque du Soleil?? That's like having a lifelong fear of horses and cows and having your wedding at a rodeo.

Ohmigod, preach it. There was a time in my town when it seemed like every. single. concert. was just an excuse to mosh, with no rhyme or reason for the band or the tempo of the song. They Might Be Giants? Mosh pit. Shawn Colvin? Mosh pit. Peter Gabriel? BLOOD ON THE CEILING THERE WAS SO MUCH MOSHING AAAAA

Damn it, that sent me into a 5 minute reverie about what Lisa Frank's attic would have looked like. The last two minutes involved Nazis falling backwards down the stairs, blinded by the bright colors.

Friday Night Comedy from BBC Radio 4: The News Quiz is like Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me's smarter, funnier older sibling, and the host, Sandy Toksvig, gets a lot of comedy mileage out of being short, gay and Danish. It's the only podcast besides The Bugle that's made me laugh uncontrollably.

I had no idea Pixar was coming out with a line of sex toys. Oh my.

I am *begging* you for pictures.