“a T-shirt sleeve that ripped because a bicep was flexed too vigorously from within it”

They really understand their target demographic.

Gorgeous. And yet another toy I’ll have to do without since my failure to win Powerball. Thanks, Obama!

The Steelers and Bengals are laughing.

The song selections are usually pretty dull, but I dug this one. Thanks!

I blame Phil Simms

Always a good decision.

Using a neck roll and not having his belt tight are called “foreshadowing.”

It’s adjusted each year.

But only if they retain Manziel. They could teach each other so much.

He’ll probably miss out on post-season festivities — team dinner, awards, etc. — but I have to think it’s a good trade.

This is a good raccoon.

Well, maybe. Is it so hard to believe that these responses would look different if the allegations centered on someone less respected? How would the Internet react to HGH use by Brady or Vick?

Please, NFL powers that be, do not deprive us of this man. I know his head coaching tenure has been disappointing, but we NEED him.

For some reason thinking about Peyton’s sex life is like thinking about my parents’ sex life. I really don’t want him to have genitals at all.

I came here hoping for advice on noise-canceling headphones (long long long flight coming up) — disappointed.

I came here hoping for advice on noise-canceling headphones (long long long flight coming up) — disappointed.

I laughed through the whole fucking thing, and got disgusted looks from fellow movie-goers. This may have been the only tangible benefit of my liberal arts education.

In Egypt the train toilets are just slots that dump everything on the tracks. Super fun.

This isn’t up to the level of some others, but it’s worth recounting:

You mean like the guy masturbating at me through the window of the adjacent car of the L?