They are pro-life up to the point of birth, then after that “Let them die and decrease the surplus population”.

I saw Satan Den of Babykillers when they were playing for crowds of, like, 10. Great show.

I cook for my family because I like it more than my wife does and I’m better at it. Also because she does the cleaning. Kasich is not getting my vote.

“Liberal dick”

It’s perfect that she picked a middle name that’s more of a tribute to a fictional white dude who turned out to be pretty racist in another book, than to an actual black dude who helped start the American Revolution.

True, but I'd bet the US still has at least a 2:1 asshole ratio over Canada.

does she? do you have any pics? i need them for... uh... science.

I think maybe we’re a groundhog’s day situation. I’m going to grab a toaster and get in the tub to test out the theory.

I mean sure-we all get a little upset when down graded. I get that it’s really hard for her to be moved from the best seat to the second best. But it IS hard to sympathize with her as when I’m downgraded from MY seat, I have to hang on to the wing, screaming, like some sort of nightmare at 20 thousand feet.

(and isn’t it “lily white”?)

Completely stolen from Margaret Atwood and paraphrased quite poorly:

I’m actually one of these people, but I also think alcohol is harmful in many more ways, and I would never advocate for a return to prohibition. That’s as absurd as our current drug laws. It’s pointless and counterproductive.

That’s why we can’t make sushi, right?

This dates me, but my Jane Seymour crush begins in 1973 when she played Solitaire in Live and Let Die (the first James Bond film with Roger Moore.)

Aw thanks! You, too ;)

Anything that keeps him off movie screens is a good thing.

Haha wow! These are great ! They’re ALL across the board. Good job!

Yeah, I mean, obviously waving a gun around is crazy, but phobias by definition are illogical and irrational. It sounds like his coworkers purposefully triggered his phobia because they thought it would be funny to watch him panic, then they complanied that he acted unhinged while in the midst of a panic attack. It’s…

Do the sorority houses have banners that say “We’re all on our periods” and “Our blow jobs will leave teeth marks on your dick!” as security measures?