Only 1 elite ever got his...Maddoff. That was only since he stole from the rich.

No shit.

If they wanted to “bring gun-toters into the fold,” they’d stop with the ridiculous stances: “Trump for Emperor!” “Arm the dogs and, maybe, some cats!” “Russia believes in private gun ownership, too!”

Me: There’s no way the NRA can find someone worse than Oliver North ...

Usually he goes all in on his first one, then bets less on the latter ones because he has a big lead built up. The only times people come close are if either he gets the DD really early (can’t bet as much) or if someone else manages to get one of the DDs. When he gets one in first round with $6k and suddenly has $12k…

My wife and I have spent the last few weeks trying to figure out what a loss for him would look like. It’s hard to picture; he doesn’t appear to have any knowledge holes.

tough to quit a $150k/hour job though

Imagine going through all these tests and auditions only to be up against a steam-roller.

“Well done steak” actually means “hour old Whopper” in White House parlance.

<pedantry/> Melanin. Melatonin is that stuff that helps you sleep. But your point remains a good one. (Side note: why the hell is JD Martinez going? Is is just because he’s really into guns?)

David Price, Mookie Betts, Jackie Bradley Jr., Rafael Devers, Hector Velazquez, and Christian Vazquez

Why Your Band Sucks, 2019 Edition

Their third album was surprisingly good, and I think it's underrated. I would never call them rock.  It's Indy pop, and for that, they are pretty good at it. 

Yeah Drew made a one-liner dig at Frank Zappa in a Funbag like three years ago and I still think about it.

When Drew turns his sights on something you enjoy...the hurt is just too much.

Goddamn it.

But tax breaks! /s

Them: All I know is, if you’re gonna tell me that a child is going to travel the world for eight years training and learning to become a master fighter, I’ll tell you’re being ridiculous.

The golden ring of hell.

Oh brother... All the poor VFX artists slaving away in front of their computers from now until November working 22 hour days on the fucking Sonic The Hedgehog movie. It sounds like the lowest ring of hell.