Crystal Palace is only three points off the pace you bitch

In what world does a 61% probability = “Already nearly certain?”

Washington Redskins are 3-0 in the preseason - have they already won the Super Bowl!?!

No. Jesus.

i know several women in confederate states who also would pick cousins over a black man

That first story has to be made up, right?

Look on the bright side, it could have been “What’s New Pussycat”?

I heard the Dodgers celebrated with an adult diaper party.

baseball is a weird game

So THAT’s what Obi-wan heard.

Chlorine mom? I’ve heard about her. Her husband can be pretty reactionary at times, and their kids are SO damn salty.

Dump in some extra chlorine mom, that pool is all full of ursine now.

Take them to school, dipshit.

“I don’t know why he needs to keep going behind the back like this.”

They say that Deez Nuts is an Independent, but in my experience he has always leaned more to the left.

Sometimes I love America, and sometimes I REALLY love America.

Any matchup between Baylor and Texas Tech is mostly BUTT.

In short: the DH can go fuck itself.