I have long argued that the time to create gift registries is upon graduation from either high school or college - that milestone upon which kids leave their parents home, but basically don't own shit beyond some bedroom pieces and a few posters.

Except now he's accusing women of misconstruing what he said.

I think he is literally going to make the exact same argument he did on the show and not even realize it.

Stephen A's basic message: "If I start by saying 'It's not right to hit a woman,' THAT'S the part you're supposed to pay attention to. Not the part where I go on to say we should be mindful of how women provoke their beatings."

He's one of those guys who thinks you can start a sentence with "Not to be offensive,…

"Dress Right For Your Red Shift"

I think I speak for us all when I say I would read the everloving shit out of that.

But they have a whole month dedicated to breast cancer awareness! They give 5% of the profits to Susan Komen! You bet the NFL cares about women('s money)!

This would make total sense if men could biologically carry, birth, and nurse babies. Or if gestation, birth, and recovery were a quick, effortless situation.

That is completely ridiculous, because maternity leave is a special situation that requires special consideration. First of all, maternity leave is a medical necessity. It is not a woman making a choice to leave her company for no reason - birth is really difficult, and comes with many physical and chemical…

You know that EVERY SINGLE ONE of these dragons has at least two kids, a stay at home wife, and a mistress.

This just strengthens my desire to go to Portland.

Ice cream is good. Rose City Revolution with honey and rose petals sounds divine. Anti-choice people should be restricted to low-fat vanilla ice for all eternity. In hell.

"Planned Parenthood is an amazing organization that does so much to help women have access to affordable healthcare," she says. "The fact that some people only focus on what is such an infinitesimal part of the service they provide is confusing to me."

Honey vanilla with rose petals sounds really good. Also, fuck those guys.

What was this about? Google is failing me.

You know what else? This perfect, handsome, billionaire made his billions by... get this... no, you are not ready for this, I guarantee... stand up so you don't hurt yourself...

...by feeding the poor.

this is my plan. i'm going to get kicked out of the theater and regret nothing.

Exactly.

"There really isn't much to know about me. I mean, look at me."

This line killed me.

I think Secretary had acting in it. This just looks appalling.