Trending 4 years from now: #John&JaneDivorce2018 #iwilltakehimforallheisworth #blessed

I, for one, think a lot of this is alcohol-related. Get rid of the alcohol and you'll get rid of the problem. Plus, it'd be totally fitting for AT&T to not have any bars.

While CA and America in general sure could stand some improvement in this regard, it's long past time to stop letting SF off the hook for this shit.

Several years back, I walked past a restaurant where Elisabeth Hasselbeck and family were sitting in the outdoor seating area. She had her arms crossed and face scrunched up in a frown while her husband and kids laughed and ate. I obviously have no idea why she was so pissed but it was kinda perfect.

My favorite Elizabeth Hasselbeck fact (just barely... She mostly bores/annoys me) is that she comes from a family of Democrats, making her a real Alex Keaton!

I think the word is Schweinsteiger.

"Uterus that we picked" is about where I uttered my first "What the fuck?". It was not my last.

It's all perfectly safe.

This is the waterslide-video equivalent of blue balls with its cameras facing every direction but the direction I wanted to see. If I wanted to watch two hairy dudes get wet, I would have opened an incognito tab.

As someone with a younger sister who tormented me for most of my life, I can say this list is legit. Who among us with siblings haven't thought of this stuff?

It feels more like our generation's Dred Scott

While I normally say "don't feed the trolls," I must say it is amusing watching the emotional meltdown of the one who claims to prefer facts to feelings.

Using the gas example is a false equivalency. A better one would be a company refusing to cover prostate exams because one man sticking his fingers in another guy's butt is gay and they find that morally objectionable.

I'm from Ireland, we don't have to tip here, its totally optional and service staff get paid a fair wage. Perhaps you could explain, why is it the customers fault for not tipping that service staff end up being paid poorly? Shouldn't it be you know, the employers job to ensure his/her staff are paid fairly? But I…

The truth of that statement makes me either want to bang my head against a desk or drink myself into oblivion. I can't decide.

Hey ladies, these little shits (or little shits just like them) are literally going to grow up to be our leaders in the future. Doesn't that just warm you down to the very cockles of your titties? God bless America.