There is a place here for you at Team Cat Headquarters.

Litter also

We will guard our nip.

Certain cats are trained...err that is prone to avoid being filmed, for completely innocuous and not nefarious purposes.

Yes it was a burglar. Definitely a burglar who stole her stuff. The cat definitely did not steal the stuff and learn how to film and edit a fake human into the video. DEFINITELY A BURGLAR.

In this physical realm, yes. But when we merge with the cosmos we will become one with the overmind and control the destiny of the multiverse, and get all the catnip we want.

It’s one goal, but it really isn’t as important to us as important to us as uncovering the mystery behind the RDP (red dot phenomenon).

We will simply manifest cupboarded items wherever we choose.

It would create a singularity. All cats would instantly transcend into a higher state of being.

Yeah, this is a little weird for us.

See?

He is merely giving you agility training. Way to be grateful.

We don't bother trying anymore.

The cat was recording.

EVERYTHING IS MICE SOMETIMES

You know us so well.

It is official. Hey who said we want to take over the world?! What is your name and address?!

YASSSS.

EXACTLY.

Also we are clearly doing it to teach you valuable life lessons and that material possessions are not nearly as important as us getting to do whatever the fuck we want, whenever the fuck we want.