I totally just muttered ‘Stupid sexy lochte’ like ‘Stupid sexy flanders’

“plus all the Remy Martin you can drink.”

Ned approves of pet thread, even though his ear’s inside out.

Lost him Oct. 2015.

You do this because the modern world has set you up. In the actual world, you would have gone on dates with the guy, and been able to assess whether he actually liked you, and whether you actually liked him, and wanted to be intimate with him. You would have been ale to make an accurate assessment about whether you…

It’s a champagne supernova of sperm.

Yayyyy what are their names?

Aw, I do love a cat in the sunshine. Congratulations on your new kitten friends!

Force me why don’t you.

My Speedy Demon Spawn Puppeh heading out on a flee attack. Prepping for trialing this year. I am so in love with this little girl!

I adopted kitties this week! Pet thread?

All of these men are my boyfriends. They were fighting over my taco: I said whoever won could eat it. But while they were fighting I ate it myself. It was my last one. Next time I go to Taco Bell, I’ll be sure to get a 12 pack.

Score one for Team Normalize Depression! It makes me so happy when celebs talk about it, I think it’s really brave.

I brew a better beer using unfiltered water from my backed up gutters and some old barley flour I found in the back of the pantry.

Yes, the deck in Below Decks is a holodeck and VPR stands for Vulcans Promoting Robots

I’m kinda late to this so I don’t know if anyone will see it, but I wanted to share. I spent ALL DAY building raised garden beds in my mostly empty backyard and they are FAB.

NYE 1999 belonged to him.

Hey Jezzies!!!