I’m partial to the thirty-nine and a half foot pole. I know it isn't the most vivid or disgusting. but as a child it always made me laugh. 

Wait, garlic in your soul is bad? Eff that. Garlic is amazing and I would like to have a soul made of garlic if only to keep the vampires away. 

Austin is legitimately amazing for ~72 hours. any more than that and you’ll be begging to leave.

You bring up an interesting point that prompts a related thought: Should that list change depending on which state the person is from? I mean, I wouldn’t shed a tear if some members of the voting public never left their home states, for instance.

As a black man in America, my list of “must visit” states is drastically smaller. Fuck if you’re ever going to catch me in Idaho.

Why are so many astronauts from Ohio?  If you’ve been to Ohio you’d try and get that far away from it too.

Does the death of Kevin James’ movie career count?

Ohio: What if we took everything terrible about the Deep South and added cold weather?

Trent Dilfer and I have the same number of 400 yard games over the course of our careers. My career is in marketing and PR though.

The Rams and Chiefs just played the greatest Monday Night Football game ever and the Deadspin recap managed to work in two shots at the Buffalo Bills.

It’s a sad day when she gets an NFL job before Colin Kaepernick.

Rice is a shrewd choice for the only organization in America that tortures more people than the Bush administration.

Maybe don’t describe the other gymnastics scandal as “the best”

Griffin doesn’t have to be brilliant elite, he just has to be competent.

“there is an expression you often see on T-shirts and bumpers stickers that goes more or less like this: “Jesus Said It. I Believe It. That Settles It.”

Well written.
TLDR: Trump is a poor person’s idea of what a rich person is, dumb person’s idea of what smart person is, a weak person’s idea of what strong person is.

Trump is the embodiment of the American Dream for a depressing number of people in this country. It’s not so much the money or power, but having enough of it that it can allow you to say an infinite number of stupid things without threat to your status or livelihood.

Ennui is just situational deplression as experienced by people with literary educations. It’s not a mystery. 

Such a singular movie, I always felt it should belong to the “Films to watch on your own” category, as if the mere presence of someone else could break the mood you describe.

So I’m watching it, thinking the writing is maybe a tiny bit improved from the past couple of episodes, still feeling like I’m watching 1/4th of a real Sunny episode with Dennis “out of frame” and Charlie and Dee given one line each.