you can't help but feel bad for someone immediately sent back to detroit

Since the NRA and its lobbyists manage to successfully make the argument that "it's too soon to talk about it" every time there is a school shooting — and there have be 87 of them since Sandy Hook — I really don't see why satire should be out of bounds. You say it's too soon and going to be taken seriously by young…

A team forfeiting a league title after a tragic school shooting, this is what happens in Obama's America.

Well, then, nevermind.

If rape culture and sneaker sales were really that intertwined, wouldn't Vans have more cross-over appeal?

Because ESPN's Facebook comments section is an unmoderated hellhole that makes YouTube's comments section feel like it is inhabited by solely Nobel Prize winners.

As we've found out recently, people that associate with the NFL would slap women for a lot less.

Those fans are gonna be so mad when someone reads that sign or this article to them. So mad, you guys.

By the looks of that belly, he's also familiar with French Fry(e)

Bills Two Best Running Backs Carted Off in One Half

"Trygve Lief Bjorkstam!"

Swift was detained at the House of Trygve Lief Bjorkstam...

He should have cheated on himself, that would have probably worked better.

"I'm sure Jarryd has a burning desire to make it in the NFL. Of course, that desire probably isn't hot enough to melt steel beams."

Was there an incident when marathon trolls yelled "ALMOST THERE" after the second mile?

Pretty sure the original comment was a joke and it just flew over your head

It isn't in the post, so here is a YouTube version.

This definitely deserves a \_O___/

I'm sure his grandfather, Judge Smails, will get him released on his own recognizance.