Time machine, flashback, or cheap nostalgia pandering? Taking all bets!

It turns out Maverick was flying for Iran the whole damn time

Rent already got its definitive lampooning in Team America...which also nailed Cats at the same time, so you can’t accomplish the mission that was already accomplished.

Marketing research found the original tagline “Where’s Your God Now?” didn’t test well.

Gonna need a pretty compelling explanation for the F-14 in the final shot...

“I’ll learn you kids something else with your new-fangled, computerized whatchamafizits! Who’s your teach— WHOOSH — oh, oh that was very fast. Well, did I ever tell ya about the time I got myself outta a flat spin?”

I’m guessing you watched Iron Eagle with your second kids.

I crashed so many times the damn Duck Hunt dog came in and started laughing at me.

The third act turns into a Heist Movie, where Tom and Goose Jr. break into the boneyard, refurbish a Tomcat and fly off into the sunset

I’mma watch the shit out of this, but where the hell is Tom Skerritt? You could set your watch by that man’s haircut.

This is awful.  That is all.

That looks amazing! I was ready for it to be another psychological space madness film (of which we likely have too many). Instead it looks like some old-school hard sci-fi a la Arthur C Clarke. 

...and that’s 10 years ago!

I think the only reason consumer drones are still legal is that the general public don’t understand how good the technology is. I got one a few months ago, and it’s astonishing...it’s also only a pointed stick or sharpened set of propellers away from being a death machine AS IS.

Here’s one…

Did you ever read this insane New Yorker article about the effort to manufacture recoilless weaponry (including automatic shotguns!) for use on drones? It is the stuff of nightmares:

I’m very curious about things like accuracy and stability when firing a rifle from a hover board. I picture a lot of bad stuff happening, some of it taking place upside down. 

They would have been much better off dropping the.....voluntary manslaughter(?) issue right away. Focus on the women’s lives and how even after doing something objectively great like vanquishing evil and coming together all their shit can still fall apart.

At this very moment, a high-ranking a-hole has just informed the developer of the hoverboard that his entire project has been cancelled for ridiculously petty reasons. With no other recourse, the developer will enable a highly dangerous and experimental mode for the hoverboard, and for reasons not well explained will…

HON HON HON IT IZ I ZE GREEN GOBLIN!

You do know that its gross to cheer on prison rape, right? fucking disgusting. The majority of men in prison are black men in jail, some in for minor crimes, some in for nothing at all. But your dumbass here in cheering for rape.

Kelly is an objectively awful person, but expressing joy that he’ll get brutally raped in prison is pretty fucking sadistic. Sexual violence in prisons, and the enabling of it, hurts way more people than just those who you deem “deserving”. And in any case, perhaps we as a society should hope that no one is ever…