That’s the most work anybody at an Apple Store has done in years.

True dat. Hard to maintain a terrorist network when only one guy gets to do all the shooting.

The Cleveland of sports nations. National export is Sadness.

Incredible. I imagine this deal has raised eyebrow across the league.

I guess Blackhawk fans will be...

[Are completely unsure as to who to root for]

He had a disproportionate amout of oops to alleys here

Lebron’s 4-2 record tops Jordan’s 0-6 record. GOAT

Yea, us Cavs fans are having a blast right now!

Rental Car Agent: Would you like to purchase the renter’s insurance?

Starred because you’re obviously a real man.

I loved this when it was called “Jackass.”

Damn, that Republican primary is heating up

Reminds me of one of my favorite jokes: What’s the difference between mono and herpes?

I live 30 minutes east of Ames

Specifically, here is an article describing, and for ease of reference, here are its rules:

Once at my cousin’s wedding, after a few beers during the cocktail hour, I made my way over to a bowl of what I thought were Wasabi peanuts. After popping a couple in my mouth, I realized it was a bowl for Olive pits. Awesome. Killed all the germs with copious amounts of alcohol.

Not long after my wife and I got married, I found myself alone in the apartment with no food except for the remains of weeks-old birthday cake. I sat in the dark watching TV and ate it, and was surprised at how moist it still was after all that time. The wife came home from work after a while and turned on the lights,…

I was about 10 years old and was at a friend’s house. He was playing in the basement, and I was upstairs for some reason. I opened the fridge, looking for a snack to sneak. There it was, a jar of vanilla cake frosting, about half-empty! I grabbed a spoon and took a huge bite.

My older brother (we were both teens) once reheated and ate a two-cup microwaveable container of what he thought was mashed potatoes and gravy, only to discover afterward that it was just gravy. He had diarrhea for several days and I laughed at him. It’s not as funny now that I see it written.