This is like the perfect storm.

Nice.

Haha. Fantastic.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/UEFA_Champions_League

Actually, in a little-publicized snafu, the mutt almost started on Bayern's left wing after the club took Ribery to the pound by mistake.

Choose one (and please explain why)

That's good.

+1

This piece sounds ridiculous now, but I'm sure Gronk will be thinking otherwise while he's picking splattered pieces of cougar media from ab-crevices after going shirtless in a Tampa martini bar.

Great stuff. Can't wait for the piece on the game!

Russel! Russel! It seems like you disappeared a little bit ...

OK, so I turn left at the dresser, grab the dildo, jump over the pile of binders, head toward the closet ...

God rewards athletes who have faith with good health and success.

Nice

+1

Really great stuff. Thanks Tom.

A message from Mike Vrabel's stitched up forehead:

I've given this organization, I've given Florida State, I've given my high school everything I've got.

[Sees Heisman on screen]

Reads headline, calls lawyer