Corrections: In the December 1, 2011 article titled "Georgia Defense Looks To Make Mark Against LSU," an obscenity was accidentally printed. The Greenville News regrets the error. We promise that shit won't happen again.

Jay: So, do you have any advice for me before I propose to her?

+1

I heard their first idea was to put together a video highlighting the city's vast gastronomic and historical places of interest. Then someone used Google, and found out Velveeta is made in New York - so ... Plan B.

Billy Hunter says the players have rejected the league's latest offer, which he called "extremely unfair," and says he is seriously considering telling his mom unless David Stern gives him back his Shark Bites right now!

And here we have Brian Dawkins unsuccessfully utilizing the "Don't shoot, don't shoot, I'm one of the hostages!" defense, which hasn't really been seen much since the 1972 Munich Olympics.

Jesus this lady overreacted. Who hasn't had this happen in their dorm room once or twice? I mean, it happened to me, and when I woke up, I just told Phillip Rivers to go home.

"Kevin, Despite Everything That's Going On Around You, Making 'Waterworld' Is Still One Of The Greatest Ideas In The Motherfucking World."

The meeting was cut short when another group of men invaded the gathering and tried to beat each knuckleballer to death with sticks. The police do not think it was a coincidence that these men were all former MLB catchers.

+1

Ridiculous. Love it.

+1. I, for one, am glad you didn't retire from the internet for a week.

NFL stormtrooper: (Handcuffs Clark)

+1

Executive Vice President and Provost Rodney A. Erickson, will be appointed ...

Oh wow, I didn't recognize him at first. Didn't he pioneer the now-standard 10-0-0 formation? And furthermore, I'm pretty sure Bob Bradley's preferred 4-5-1 (with 5 central holding midfielders all playing inside their own 18) was also a descendant.

I'm not sure how mad we can be at Sepp - I'm not sure if his home country of Switzerland has ever felt the need to remember any troops for any reason. Ever.

I find it ironic that one of the duties of Gloucester County's Freeholder-Elect is to alert county meeting attendees of the County Chairman's presence by proclaiming "All Rise."

Oh that's funny. +1 ridiculous war flashback

Joe Buck: Sits, opens laptop, clicks to e-mail