Yeah, nothing turns up the heat like Paul Dano, who looks like a half-cooked still wet clone of Tim Heidecker.  Mmm mmm gimme some of that angel food cake fail.

Turns out they had a threesome... on top on an ancient burial ground!  Can sparks fly as fast as all these pissed off ghosts? 

You’re missing the point. I don’t care what Pratt does. Even if he’s super nice, even if he’s super mean. Even if he visits hospitals as Star-Lord, which he does and I think is great. That’s not even slightly relevant to me. He’s a multi-millionaire. He gives to his church. His church gives to conversion therapy. He…

Hey if Hollywood gonna vomit up a dumb guy every thirty minutes, maybe that’s the place that should pace itself.

Zoe Church is an “affiliate of Hillsong” which as a church gives a lot of money to conversion therapy. Conversion Therapy is basically summer camp except instead of canoes and songalongs it’s torturing and brainwashing gay teenagers until they break enough to pretend they aren’t gay.

Effectively it doesn’t matter how…

Kinda weird to say Mangianello is just “miscast” and leave it at that. I guess he’s bad at flirting? Has that always been his thing? Was he bad at that in those Magic Mike movies too?

Also yeah, the whole language model of “word-word” like “Think-speaks” is always immediately wrong sounding, especially since it was a…

Maybe not misleading, but I bet dollars to donuts it’s not spelled right. There’s no way it wasn’t supposed to be “Ruin” your wallet. I mean Diablo’s the lord of ruin!

Oh, you end up as a cast member on Jackass.

Nah, they aren’t trying to sell to just people.  They only give a shit about whales.  Whales want the drop rate that bad, so when they finally manage to brute force buy one, they’re special.

I’d say there’s room to find differences between “Much older sister serving as surrogate parental figure and her younger weird sister that needs special care and help” and “Sisters of similar age separated by one of them being potentially dangerous.”

Always check for tiny shrimp, coral fragments, or coarse sand. All these may indicate you’ve been served a glass of ocean water.

Man where is the other Marvel hero with an impossibly good and relatable family? He’s probably Miles away. Miles and Morales miles.

Yes, please put Graggle in the actual show.  Everyone always loves it when the brand runs with the joke.  It’s why Morbius is still in theaters to this very day, packed to a degree that Hamilton is jealous about.

That exists already!  There was a short about Alberto and Massimo learning to live together.  It was super adorable.

The old Tartakovsky Clone Wars microseries had Yoda TK grab an enormous trade federation battleship in space and just whack it into another one. 

Yeah, I remember thinking “Well at least those could just be Utahraptors or Deinonychus” because there’s usually a bigger theropod. But that mosasaur is just silly. They should have put in a nice silly looking 70 ft Leedsichthys or a Shastasaurus, but those don’t look like dragons.

What in the good fuck is a taco doing in that picture then? That’s some fire-ass badtimes choice making.

It’s uhh... it’s insurmountable.  I wouldn’t normally but you put it in quotes like you were trying to hit us with some good old “Webster’s Defines...” and that dog won’t hunt, monsignor.

Those are the same thing, so it doesn’t really matter. Some pan folks that need an outgroup to be superior to will try to occasionally argue that pan people are attracted to more expressions of gender than bi people are, but they only ever do so by arbitrarily stating what bi people aren’t into, usually without…

I don’t recall Disney asking me to say that.  Did you like get a letter or something?