NOW. It’s right now, you special little unicorn, you.

Defend your Jurassic Park take here in front of everyone.

You sick of that coattail rider Grierson yet?

Did AJ really ruin Deadspin?

Keep Angelos. And Natty Boh. We won’t weep.

“The Nats Are On Life Support...” It’s good thing Walgreens, proud sponsor of the Nationals, has a Take-care Clinic to meet all their needs.

Matt Williams’ default setting for any and all media interaction: Dick-ish father of your high school girlfriend.

must not click... can’t get lost in TVTropes... resist...

I’d say the keyword is “unabashed”. He was about 2% abashed by his Boston homerism during his tenure at ESPN.

Wait, when was he ever fair and balanced?

“There’s nothing in the rulebook that says a robot can’t play Quarterback.”

Before I saw it was Simmons, I expected the first tweet to be “fuck yall, u faggot losers”

@BillSimmons

You could take off Brady’s skin and find out that he wasn’t a human, but a robot programmed to play football and Patriots fans would be like “Who’s to say robots can’t play football these days? Why doesn’t anyone talk about all the other jobs that robots are taking over? It’s all just a witch hunt because everyone’s…

This was exactly the tantrum reaction we all knew was coming. The most Simmons-y thing Simmons could’ve done.

DP said last week that he’d consider returning to ESPN if he was allowed to publicly fire one producer. Can we assume that he was referring to Norby?

Let’s nip this one in the bud: filming opposing teams’ sidelines was only legal from designated areas in the stadium, and the Patriots’ tapes were filmed from outside those areas. So argue over how big a violation it was, but it was technically illegal the whole time.

So the story goes, DP was being overworked due to his diverse sports knowledge & skills, asked for more time off to spend with his family, & Norby refused.

The fans really can’t use the heat as an excuse. Washington sports fans have made it perfectly clear that they are okay with red skin.

The centerfield gate at Nationals Park has turned out to be a tremendous design flaw. About 90% of the crowd uses that gate, and it’s highly visible from the press box. So any time a lot of people leave early, it’s really noticeable, and visiting broadcast teams point it out every chance they get. It may not be that…