I typed “Kristen Stewart sexuality” into the Google thing up there and it says her sexuality is “Network Connectivity Problems.”

So, to make up for their epic fuck up, they offered her a free abortion? Did it come with a toaster too? Or at least validated parking?

You want to see concern trolling hit critical mass? Check out any video that features a child in a car seat. Granted, a lot of kids are improperly secured in car seats or are using the wrong kind of car seat for their age/height/weight/whatever, and I think there’s a way to bring it up to a fellow parent in a helpful…

I’m just gonna guess Rita Ora for all of them.

You know what’s awkward? Having an acquaintances 6 year old grab at my charm bracelet and then relentlessly beg me for two of the charms off of it.

There was a woman on the news this morning who represented Women for Trump. She was trying to defend his comments. She sounded just like him when she was talking. It was so uncanny how she didn’t answer the questions and how she said that we were gross for seeing his statements that way. She went on and on about how…

What’s Jessica Williams’ next move? Is she staying with The Daily Show or moving on?

Luke Perry should take a few tips from Daniel Radcliffe. Here you go, Luke. How not to be an asshat, lesson #1.

At an office building that I once worked in, there was a bathroom that was down an abandoned hallway. Nobody knew about it, and it was GLORIOUS. I would step away, take as much time as I wanted without anybody barging in, I’d relish in a fleeting moment of solitude then return to work.

Here is the number #1 (no pun intended) rule of etiquette for multi-stall bathrooms: If you are done with your business and the other door that was shut when you got there is still shut, someone is holding onto their poop for dear life, praying that you will hurry up and leave. Please move along. Hopefully someone…

I feel your pain. Multi-stall bathrooms are awful. People talk on the phone and to each other and my sphincters clinch up and I know I’m going to get a UTI or something because EVERYONE SHOULD BE QUIET IN THE BATHROOM.

Word. In most of the jobs I have had, the extroverts spend most of their time chatting each other up and “looking” busy and important while the rest of us were actually doing our jobs.

If I had a popular, outgoing kid, I wouldn’t know what to do. Seriously, having a popular cheerleader type kid would be really challenging for me. I tend to like people who are reflective and thoughtful. When I imagine having kids, I picture us reading together. Together, but each caught up in our own little world.…

You clearly don’t know much about actual introversion besides the clichés.
The whole point of Cain’s book is that introverts CAN get shit done, just in their own fashion because we’re wired differently. Also, we get some shit done that extroverts can’t ! Extroverts aren’t particularly as effective or as smart as they…

Did you guys read the whole Times article? They’re acting like this lady invented introversion. Get your head out of your ass, New York Times Style section. Everyone knows Emily Dickinson invented introversion.

But a police station was not her only option. It was just noted that one was near her sorority house. I’m not saying it would have made it easier for her to face anyone else, just that there were other people she could have given the baby to besides law enforcement.

Back in 2001 I worked at Bath and Body Works at Lenox Mall in Atlanta, GA when Whitney and Bobby came in. Whitney bought over $600 of candles and lotions. Bobby picked out one thing - a fishbowl full of small orange goldfish shaped glycerine soaps. He wanted every single one we had for his daughter. I can’t stop…

Who goes out on a first date in a big forest alone? That screams “YOU WILL BE MURDERED” to me.

Los Angeles “forests” don’t look like this. They are dry as hell. The biggest danger is dehydration. I’m guessing the “forest” was low brush with a few oaks. It’s hot and dry out here.

I have totally changed my babies on my lap in the seat, and I think I changed one of them on the tray once. Changing a baby’s diaper in those bathrooms is not possible, there just isn’t anyplace to lay them down - there is no changing table back there. And, if you haven’t bought a second seat for the baby, then you…