You know I’d like to take your point one step further about consensual BDSM. How do we know that both men and women aren’t being groomed from a very young age, by our culture, to have a preference for these “fantasies”. If your first and thereafter most exposures to sex come from a Dom/sub/master/slave etc. etc.…

See thats another angle, I accept that in a truly balanced equal world a small minority of people would enjoy these things, the issue is that they are normalised. But I can see you get what I’m on about. As for those who don’t have any other options, I still hope they’re not pressured into it because they don’t have…

You’re exactly on the money with this one. We shouldn’t have to get therapy to accept a society fuelled by addictions regarding to porn/sex and so on. Society needs to recognise these things and find ways to deal with them.

But how do you tell? In a society where porn has become so normalised, how do you tell who’s watching and who’s not? And if you do get into a long term relationship how do you know your partner might not get addicted to it later.

Clearly it is, don’t you know you’re just up yourself for thinking every man wants you ////thismuchsarcasm

I agree with you the sense that banning porn isn’t the answer, but looking at why so much porn is violent. So much has extreme dynamics of dominant/submission. Why the most popular ones are where women pretend they’re underage etc etc is well the most popular. We’re going to have to dig deep into our society,…

Oh my gosh yes!! Im actually from Australian and it didn’t even take off in mainstream media here. The only reason I heard about it was because I follow a prominent feminists page (Clementine Ford), who put it on her Facebook page. And there was a school 3 km from my road involved in that as well as another in my…

Yeah I do hate the fact that thats the society I’ve had to grow up in. That violent, rough sex is normal, but the loving romantic type isn’t. Im seriously willing to bet you a million dollars that if we lived in a matriarchy the type of sex that is most filmed/most popular in porn right now would not be the most…

If you like it its fine, in fact I would assume that someone who has been abused would run the other way from those. But I’m not ok with a culture, society, media... just everything normalising and forcing these things on us. To the point that you’re just supposed to be ok with it. Oral sex is supposed to be ok as…

Yet with each passing year more and more is coming out on porn running relationships/causing breakups. More and more on kids growing up now bought up on porn, speaking out against it. And no matter my personal views on porn, whether I never mention or watch it in my life, I have to be exposed to a society where such a…

But perhaps he wouldn’t have had unrealistic expectations if it wasn’t for porn. I’m not having a go at you but this is actually really common in friends around me. We often say there’s like a two screening levels a guy has to go through. First is how brainwashed he might be by porn/our male dominated society to view…

This. Exactly this! Its like before women were divided into virgins vs whores. Wives, daughters etc were in the virgin category, meaning they only had sex on marriage, for procreation, women don’t enjoy sex blah blah. And then there were the prostitutes which men went off to have the “extra sex” which they didn’t with…

Thats great for you. But what about the fact that porn pushes a certain kind of sexual narrative. What about the fact that this is what everyone around me as well as those younger than me have grown up with. What about the fact that none of us have been able to create a sexual identity or find sexual expression…

I hope not. What I’m getting at is that there is a grooming affect of porn when exposed to it from a young age. There is a specific narrative around porn, and that narrative is not balanced loving sex. Why is that the most popular porn is so often violent, rough and so on. Why isn’t that a kink of its own? That gives…

I don’t mean all of them, I know there will always be people who like things that are out there. What I’m talking about is the normalisation of these things, to the point where young people grow up thinking this is what it should be like. In my own experience I was expected to grow up to think that oral/anal etc are…

Its not just teenagers, even older men who weren’t exposed to the porn thats been “normal for the last 10-15 years or so start expecting and demanding things that are basically degradation of the female body. Seriously one day in a few hundred years they’ll look back on pornography with horror.

I actually agree with the conservatives on this one.

Long time lurker but I just had to comment on this. I feel exactly the same as you. And it feels like a knife in the back is how mainstream feminism has accepted porn as “cool” and “expressive” and if you don’t like it you’re a “prude”. I think blow jobs are disgusting, I think anal sex is disgusting and I don’t care…