This is going to be hardest on Bristol, Track, Twig, Smock, Groot, Krunk, Willow, Slider, Stub, Twiddle, Piper, Fluff, Carat, Keg, Snuggle, Bop, Rice and Spoit.

And Eli Manning upstaged Tom Brady in a Super Bowl for a third time.

James Harrison’s sons: [take AFC Championship ring away from their dad]

I hope the agent enjoys his ten percent off these contracts. And that he does not smoke all the cigs in one day.

It’s the we don’t care part.

Kept driving it until the engine gave out. Added more air fresheners.

Do you need a beer or something?

To be fair, it was a very stupid question. Do you really think Donald Trump watches hockey after what happened to his favorite team 37 years ago?

Sadly, he had no idea what to do when he reached third base

That’s pretty amazing coming from a guy who had a very public, very nasty divorce due to adultery while he was mayor of New York City. The gall of these men...

Now we just need Samsung to buy Ferrari and we’re set...

i like saying polestar as if it rhymes with molester

The Infiniti M37 and M56 had a feature built into the climate control to simulate a “forest breeze”. I guarantee you 99% of people who own one of these don’t even know about this feature.

I hate Puffalumps.

The trucks will need all that torque to carry their owners’ giant, fragile egos.

You must be new around here.

alcohol, one of the foremost scourges of humanity and a complete waste of energy, edible grains and potable water that is nothing less than a poison to both body and soul

Fuck off

That’s 4.5 Miatas, so 3.87 ‘99 Corollas.

Nailed to the Crossing Pattern: How to Cope with Turfing the Intermediate Throws of Life