It’s confusing because it’s failed satire, â la The Daily Currant, and it’s what passes for humor on the right. I eagerly await this petition to be cited by a presidential candidate.

Retirement: That would be nice.

[passes crown]

More like Sergent Icky-senko, amirite

Real leonine, pausing to globally broadcast casual indifference. Point: Mettenberger.

Parce que l’e courrier ne cesse jamais, il continue à venir et venir et à venir! Il n’y a jamais un répit!

+1 sip take

If I was Romney, I would of left several cases of Poland Spring water on Rubio’s bed. Your room is right down the hall, the second on the left- and you’re all set in case you get...thirsty.

Well, he needs a new one.

Words mean everything, despite what the haters say, and sometimes they inspire deeds.

Shark, crab, seahorse? and a_____?

Moneywise, or face-to-face sexwise? Because neither are handsome, but one of ‘em’s loaded to the gills. Straight guy hot taek, for the record. *ahem*

Ok, Doctor “Bill” (Wilhelm)

I guess, but men own dogs, though.

Is that a big, blue, veiny and bald ostrich or are you just happy to see me?

Burnt matches, people- burnt matches. If you smell ‘em, try to remember who the sitting president is.

You have my tacit and full throated endorsement. Make it so.

Whoopsadaisies.