Yeah, but maybe it’s like Prohibition or something. Make it legal, and the vast majority of people will buy the legal option, not the shady 20% off version.

You’re asking too much of humans here. 

Because then they would be out of my way when I’m driving.

I asked BMW for comment, and a spokesman gave me the following:

Or we could work harder on educating pedestrians to not walk out into the road without looking, keep a closer eye on their kids, and have cyclists and bikers keep to the fucking edge of the road.

He almost Burrowed into the ground.

Person Participates in Sport Centered Around Beating the Shit Out of Someone, Sustains Major Injury

I was scrolling down and perusing the list, trying to figure how and why, but when I got to “PIPECLEANER”, I almost shuddered out of my skin and abortmissioned the hell out of there.

I judge my year based on whether or not I appear on this list. I do not, so my year was good.

Google and Alexa are just guessing. NORAD is the real deal.

As a boat owner and someone who recently dealt with US hospital billing department I feel the Bugatti labor charges are quite reasonable. 

next customer is Saudi Arabia, so they can classify decapitations as accidents...

You’re washing down your donut with a cheeseburger?

U.S. buyers, don’t forget to factor in the cost of swapping out the wheels and tires.

since when does espn apologize for people having shitty takes?

ESPN apologized because Carville told the truth?

Penn State shouldn’t even HAVE a football team. Fucking boy-touching kiddy-diddlers.

Rooting for Ohio State in any form makes me feel gross, but the thought of that crowd of 100,000 PSU fans watching that inexplicable play call and defensive choke job is some top-tier schadenfreude

If Miguel is in fact an illegal immigrant, then he should be.  I know enforcing immigration law isn’t popular on Jezebel (Cars edition), but the majority of Americans actually support enforcing laws.

Dude, it’s just a hair clip. You don’t need to throw the whole car in a lake.