Call me a cynic, but I fully expect these assholes to all land on their feet eventually, because the world is unfair and annoyingly kind to mediocre white people.

This is so fucking rich. SO. RICH.

Crocpocalypse

i can’t hate Be Best too much since it gave me the best new work meme in ages. when someone is wasting time/useless:

A queen who obviously skips leg day. (Not my joke, stolen from Twitter but it made me giggle)

#Warren2020

It’s worse than Great Gatsby themed parties. A “Roaring 20s” themed party makes sense, but a Great Gatsby themed party makes me think you haven’t read the book and/or didn’t comprehend it. 

It’s a fantastic show and a great base for conversation, but I will never understand the people who think The Handmaid’s Tale is a good foundation for party themes and wines. Unless they’re people who don’t actually watch the show and/or read the news.

Also he is pretty good looking.

I think she’s major drama, but whether she majors IN drama, IDK.

Greetings in advance to the Fixer Upper fans who do not usually read Jezebel.com! Let me save you some time: Do not bother emailing me about my potty mouth because I have no intention of cleaning it up. 

Your daughter is smart & right. :)

Yes, it’s the invisibility in every day situations that truly pisses me. It’s like, yes motherfucker, I’m trying to get into this door - that’s why I stopped walking and am standing here. Move outta the goddamn way!

Yes. When I was 25, I would have looked at this this guy and thought he was creepy and old. Hell, I’m 41 and I think he looks old. What 25-year-old would let this man anywhere near her?

Or pedal their bike directly towards me in the crosswalk and just expect me to jump out of the way and are startled when my bellowed FUCK YOU ASSHOLE echoes off the buildings.

Yeah - your daughter and I have that in common. And I have been raged at by both men and women for thinking men over 30 are “creepy” for hitting on me. I’m not necessarily calling them “old” either. They just always act so fucking condescending. And while they’re hitting on me! Like it’s very clear they want someone…

Doesn’t all young women feel like that? I remember being grossed out that sad old sacks would ogle me. They must have been in their twenties. A 50-year-old would have made me puke at 25.

Also, in a related story: Buttercream icing > fondant.

As we have discussed elsewhere, there are EIGHT seasons, not four. Fall contains the best season and the worst season. The correct and accurate rankings: