Harvesting more minerals wouldn't hurt either.

The reason is simple. The NFL needs to construct additional pylons.

If he were jerking off, he probably would have turned off the Victoria’s Secret show to avoid the distraction.

He obviously broke it saying the pledge of allegiance or perhaps coldcocking a Syrian refugee because he’s the Marine Todd of football.

absolutely offside. Was in the direct line of the shot in an offside position. Doesn’t seem very controversial to me

I grew up working at a flooring store that my dad managed. Once when I was 17, spent Friday night with some friends getting shitfaced at somebody’s house until 4 or 5 AM. Saturday about 9 AM, my dad calls and needs me to come in to work because 2 guys scheduled had laid out. I told him I wasn’t feeling well (truth)…

Well, this one time in the ‘90s, my family went on vacation. We have a big family, and a winter storm knocked our power out, and somehow the person in charge of making sure we were all in the airport shuttle miscounted. So I got left home alone for a couple days. No biggie, I found some cash for snacks and pizza, but…

That’s true, good thing I don’t have to tell people.

Interesting. In New York, dolus eventualis means that, no matter what, James Dolan eventually fucks up everything.

My 90-year old grandfather still goes to the gym five days a week. In his case, it’s inspiring and sweet because he’s trying to maintain whatever health he can. And he has no delusions about being a body builder or athlete.

In 2013 the Spurs has crafted what was essentially a perfect team but ran into Lebron James in the finals, who simply overpowered them with his greatness.

as long as my kid doesn’t tell me to fuck off i’m happy

That’s nothing, Freddy Adu was 18 when he was 12.

But that’s not the real problem with the process. The problem is the value of getting a top 5 pick in the draft just isn’t as great as everybody thinks it is. Everybody hears number 1 pick and they think about LeBron, Shaq, or Tim Duncan. That’s why you do this. For that savior who is going to make you better than a 5…

It’s okay Drew. You know who else doesn’t like Turkey? Russia.

“Remember the Titans?”

Sometimes what doesnt kill you probably should have just killed you.

David Moyes in Newcastle is a match made in heaven, if heaven was a barren moor populated by a dour Scotsman failing miserably at playing the bagpipe.

I have never understood why more teams do not just run the ball three times and then use “TRICK PLAY! WHEREVER IT LANDS!” on 4th down. That way you still have the option for a first down if you catch the ball.