Today the Great Salt Lake is even saltier.

Did you just write about a unique bat and then not post any pictures of it?

To the dude eyebanging the uneaten eggroll, how fucking bankrupt is the communication between you and your fiance that you can’t even ask about eating one of her appetizers? If you can’t communicate over food your marriage is fucking doomed.

Something to keep in mind for those of you not working in creative fields:

Imagine, for a moment, that the iconic element of the product you spent months—perhaps years—of your life on were brought to market without your ever having been involved.

Could that product still have been completed?

Yes.

Would it still be…

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...because the health insurance companies have been doing such a great fucking job, right?

Thats not how socialized medicine works. It isnt the lowest bidder. Government goes to a company and says “Those $5 bandages? We are gonna buy those at $3.50. You maybe make full profit or you definitely profit. If your not ok with that price we go to your competitor.” Collective Bargaining.

We dont want government to take over healthcare we want them to pay for it and get better pricing. Its not like theres gonna be an accountant in the surgery rooms going “no you are out of stitches” or “you only have 3 hours for this heart transplant”.

With all its success, Simmons just should name his new site Can’t Land.

Yes. Yes he is.

That is NBA Jam levels of rim rejection. It’s just missing that awesome spring sound that used to play.

Um, if it had nothing to do with the city, then why is the T-Rex short for Torontosauras Rex, idiot.

Because the Red Sox named Jason Varitek team captain after he shoved his mitt in ARod’s face in ‘04. The Yanks followed by naming Jeter THEIR captain. And now he’s thought of as captain-ish even though it’s unlikely any of the perennial All Stars on those teams listened to a word he said.

Call me old fashioned, but I don’t see the need to have boobs in the booth.

Mike Matheny praised the fan for taking the bullet “the right way,” noting that glory boy fans in Chicago or Kansas City would’ve demanded a stoppage to the game and drawn much more attention to themselves.

Shit, now the Orioles will have to protect their honor by drilling someone on Holbrook’s crew.

I haven’t seen a Frenchman get flanked like that since 1940

If I know Balmer, the Clippers will be more stable after a small update and a reboot.

Um yeah, they were pretty liberal about spending money on exclusive TV rights to events.