Mike was like “Good gracious, pasta so tasteless”

Do they not have tacos in Argentina?

What an asshole.

And with that, Julio Jones’ incredible performance is turned into the equivalent of a pat on the head and a ‘you did good, too!’, which sucks, because he was fucking incredible last night.

The tears on this website might be a close second. It’s a fucking football game, not a metaphor for the country.

Well done. Such searing insight is rare ‘round here.

Can we all agree that Bill Simmons, regardless of current marriage status, should be the next Bachelor? Watching vapid women attempt to listen to his takes with a straight face would be primetime TV gold.

Exactly as MLK warned us about in “Letter from A Birmingham Jail”: “I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro’s great stumbling block in his stride toward freedom is not the White Citizen’s Counciler or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate, who is more devoted to ‘order’ than to justice;…

The 49ers became sold on his ability to recruit personnel after reading on his resume that he spent 15 years working as a headhunter.

I guess giving important jobs to people with no background or qualification is the new trend of 2017

Better yet, have the fans play the actual tackle football game, with the players coaching. I’d watch a bunch of overweight PFTCommenters shred an ACL or two trying to live their football glory. Well, I’d watch a taped and edited 1 hour version of it

Now all I want is for Steve Smith to come out of retirement and kick everyone’s ass at dodgeball.

I await SB Nation’s longform apologia that suggests Mr. Price became violence only after he failed to make it as a writer for the New Yorker.

Jeff Sessions is the worst of the crackers.

And now, a joke. A Utah farmer dies and goes to heaven, where he is turned away for his sinful life and sent to hell. The Devil greets the farmer in hell “Welcome you sinful bastard, to hell! As punishment, you shall now work this barren patch of land for all of eternity in the blazing heat!” The devil then leaves the…

The WARRIORS letting this happen BLEW my mind. A guy like Dion Waiters draining A THREE pointer in the clutch like this tells me ONE thing: a LEAD is never safe on South Beach.

I can’t wait for the Mark Wahlberg film.