@LuciferV8: Umm, I think your FTW may be a bit of an overstatement.

is that a SCUBA-Round? Water Rascal? What is it? Where can I get one?

@Incoherent: There's a correlation between fireworks laws and public education system spending too.

@frigg: No, if anything Texas needs to be Polka Dotted as they let counties and towns decide these things for themselves. But you can still go to any Walmart in the state and buy a 12 gauge shotgun and 100 shells to go with it. Don't mess with Texas, it's rude to pick on the handicapped.

I hope your source's name is a pseudonym. If it's not I'm sorry I'm laughing at your name and I'm sorry your parents hate you, Dick Gaywood.

How many people are going to kill themselves attempting Sonic Boom Kicks in Street Fighter 4 Hyper Alpha Turbo World Championship Kinect Edition?

And just like the Netflix and Hulu apps, just in time for some fucking data overages thanks to AT&T's 2 gig data cap. Go fuck yourself, Steve Jobs. There's your magical revolution.

@wasting_company_time: 399 if you're only eligble for a partial discount. Also, Steve Jobs has no idea what 199, 299 or 399 is, he's been a billionaire for a long time. 199 is like lunch money.

@Snow leopard: Buffalo Pork Wings

Little Lisa Animal Slurry!

Let him ride the bench. If he doesn't like that perhaps he can stay home and then he can be suspended. When his contract is up, let him go, I'm sure after staying home for a few years his celebrated work ethic will let him jump right back into football.

@Philip Han: Did you have to take El Jobso's cock out of your mouth to type that?

So, their TV sucks a lot?

Dear god don't call at&t and try to get your upgrade eligibility date changed if it hasn't already happened automagically. The CSR's are dumb as rocks, stubborn, ignorant and probably ugly and stinky.

@LemonBread: That would rule me out then as I am iphoneless.

Still Sept 23rd. I guess ATT doesn't want to make more money off of me.

@CarbonatedFalcon: The Ninendo 3DSi tea kettle attachment available soon.

@MattinglysSideburns: What the fuck does he need an elbow for anyway, it's soccer. Pussy. Rub some dirt on it.

@RobNoxious: Yea, you're just going to have to go into your boss's office and beat your own ass while begging him to stop until security arrives.