goddamn this movie is such a dumb, glorious classic

I’m beginning to get to that stage where I’ve looked at this guy’s jumpshot so often and with such focus that every single jumpshot looks weird now, like when you start saying a word over and over again and it loses meaning

Just wait till he reads my deconstructionist rebuttal that posits that LeBron, phenomenologically speaking, ... man, I don’t even have the energy to pretend what this guy did.

I guess the all-nighter must’ve really compromised this guy’s thinking but... why not just take a shit at the office and then go home? I know, wanting to get out of there quickly, but, I mean... how do you assume you’re gonna make it through your commute home?

Gonna be honest I think “WAAAAZAAAAAA” is hilarious now, in an annoying ironic way

I know “Dilly Dilly” is going to be absolutely driven into the ground, but I’m also wondering how long it will take after they mercifully stop showing the ads to bring it back. 5 years? 10? Like the Borat “my wife,” I want to see how long it takes for the joke to become played out, and then so annoying that it’s…

(And to prove we’re not entirely trapped on our tastefully decorated set with an improbably shaped table.)

I guess it depends on your definition of “yips.” To me, it’s someone who’s become utterly unable (in form or effect) to normally do something that once came 100% naturally to them.

The best athletes in the world rely on the fact that they will be able to unconsciously and consistently repeat a motion nearly perfectly. It looks like Fultz is intensely thinking about his shooting form every single time he hoists one up, resulting in all these odd hitches like his brain is saying “don’t forget to…

So... this guy 100% has the basketball yips, huh?

If I wanted to “mislead” a source like Simmons assumes of Wickersham, I’d just start leaking shit to Hench and JackO

I thought about that right after hitting publish, but Drew goes after gasbags, not highly sourced reporters, and doesn’t pretend he’s anything but a non-reporter.

It’s funny to read someone who does no actual reporting question someone else’s. The last time Bill Simmons had a scoop he accidentally tweeted out what he meant to be a DM

I’m going to start following Jonathan Franzen around with a truck full of feral cats and release them where he’s birdwatching so he has to watch

Somehow managed to beat it! Though I was usually pristine-ing or pumping if I was at all in doubt.

As a former canoe trip guide and extremely dumb person, I can say that untreated lake water / spring water tastes extremely good compared to purified. That’s almost assuredly a placebo thing, and I wouldn’t fucking sneak under cover of darkness to get some, but I almost understand this raw water guy.

I just want to pop in and say I’m glad David is working at Deadspin now. Where my fellow Roth stans at???

He seems to be pretty committed to New Orleans, but you can only expect so much loyalty from a guy when his prime is being wasted by subpar rosters. I love the Boogie - Brow combo, they had some fun moments last year throwing alley oops to each other, and they can both anchor units when the other is resting ... but…

And then doubled down on that mistake by giving him a roster that does not fit, in the slightest, his coaching ethos - pace and space, run the floor both directions, etc. Trading for Boogie was just about the final nail in that coffin, so not sure how he makes it through this season without a major philosophy change.

I know it’s preseason and all, but if the Bulls are such butt, just wondering if this is a good thing for the desperately-need-to-make-the-playoffs-in-an-incredibly-deep-Western-Conference-in-order-to-keep-their-stars-and-maybe-even-stay-in-their-market-long-term New Orleans Pelicans