Look, a philistine on the sidewalk.

Honestly, I do not understand the almost universal boner that’s sported for Kevin Harlan. To me, he always sounds like he’s straining at stool, in between hits from the meth pipe.

I’d flip 1 and 2. Less cleanup.

Oh, man, smelly bears. Or smelly something.

She’s a competitive swimmer, so that might be the way to go.

I have wondered about this for years. Who in their right mind decides to play a game that batters the shit out of them if they can make just as much or more money playing a sport that is, mostly, noncontact?

With me, it’s the shoulder. Pitching takes its toll.

My 8-year-old daughter (yes, daughter...she’s a little rough) wants to play tackle football, now.

Watching Bo carry the insufferable Brian Bosworth for what seemed like 5 seconds into the end zone was one of my favorite football moments. And I’m a lifelong Seahawks fan.

Eh. I dunno. NFL football fans are, for the most part, hopeless degenerate junkies, and as long as they’re getting their fix, they’ll put up with just about anything.

My auntie was an RN and did a three-year stint in the ER before taking a more mundane job with an orthopedist clinic.

I’m a white boy from Seattle. But take that shit the fuck off in my house, nasty-ass, dog-shit-stomping, mud-shuffling, dirk-diggling germ-ridden foot weasels.

Golden State was playing their seventh game of a seven-game roadie. So there’s that.

My wife bought me the Penguin for my birthday.

Hey, leave Giants fans out of this, you mouth-breathing muhfuckering shitheaded douchebag.