He’s my favorite lesbian in the Senate.

I thought he meant Adam & Eve the erotic clothing/dildo store which is an odd place to tell HS students to shop.

Based on Kelsi's Instagram, she finds Chlamydia kinda catchy.

“Fever Itch”

Field Of Creams

I’d rather the X-Men stay in their own, already rich universe, but that’s just me.

FF should be brought into the wider MCU though, just because literally anything would be better for them than the last 3 films

Joe West looks like a mall Santa that got fired because of beard lice.

You, I, Mark Whalberg, and every goddamned person reading this is fully and completely aware of the glaring omission in the 90 minute shower description. I’m glad you didn’t include it, but we all know.

My dad “accidentally” uses the accent of the culture whose food we are eating at a restaurant. Indian, Mexican, Vietnamese. And that’s less embarrassing than this loss.

Pretty sure Gritty has been selling grilled cheese in the parking lot before Phish shows for years.

He looks so full of life, and pcp

If by white collar career, you mean stacking shirts at JC Penney’s, then maybe.

Thank goodness somebody made this about Boston.  Good job.

You can see the guy’s white-collar career flash before his eyes the moment he realizes he’s been caught on video screaming racial epithets.  

Just wait for the day Big Johnson comes back

Equally, why combine the Punisher logo with red lives matter? Are they going to brutally execute the fire without a trial? It’s messed up that cops like to use it, but there’s a least some way it kinda makes sense there. For firefighters?

These shirts serve an important role in society: They easily identify people you should avoid talking to at all costs.

Let’s see Collinsworth spin this one on Sunday Night Friday Football.

I can relate. The gym is about dominance. Throw a med ball off the ceiling. Rearrange the treadmills. Deny people water. It’s a jungle, and you have to make it your jungle.

Possible diagnoses:
Pubonic Plague
Staff Infection
Boneitis
Sackardia
Ballemia
Nutrosis
Dongue Fever
Tooleremia
Dicklampsia
Scrotrosy