“Enjoy your silver medals, my dudes.”

Never forget: “When you’re accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression.”

[casts stone, sees it not going far enough, runs underneath to catch it, casts again]

I’m not sure if I’ll remember to check this comment section again later. Could both of you drive to my house in North Carolina and let me know when you find out? I’ll pay gas money as long as you carpool.

The whitest part of this story is that the lawyer bought the ticket on Expedia.

At this point, I genuinely don’t know what it’ll take for Pruitt to resign

I really, truly don’t understand the appeal of attending an NFL game unless you’re in a comped suite and you got free parking. I went to a Texans game last year where I was literally stuck next to a sweaty fat guy the whole time (or maybe a mirror). And the guy behind me kept yelling, “We need a first down!” as if it…

Do Not Ever Underestimate....

“The history stuff was pretty fun. It was cool to see what football was like in 1969. Ha. I said 69,” said one player who requested ‘anonymtitties’

This is utter horseshit. He’s coming to the Supersonics and nothing you can say will convince me otherwise.

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

i just read all this and i don’t know why

How dare you omit the most important fact about this man?

Your move, guns-in-schools-politicians. If you’re not willing to blast yourself in the face with your solution, is it even a solution?

Their pizza makes me shit hot tar, so this makes sense.

Giuliani probably thinks you need to wear a condom to ensure you don’t contract VPN.

It’s like my dad always says, [three minute voicemail of car noises and AM radio, muffled by his pocket].

I dunno, the way Gomez stayed down suggests two guys, one cup.

How else do you expect to produce future champions?

Did he...do you think... nah. Well, maybe...he is pretty hammered...