God I so want this to be true.

Man, if that were me I would have totally given that fuckstick a flying elbow while he was on the phone.  Hell, I wish I could have been a bystander just so I could crash into the fucker with a shopping cart to set an epic pick play.  There’s nothing that gets my juices going like the yearning to physically confront…

The “Preceded by” is hands down my favorite part of this.  Fantastic.

Exactly. Bernie Sanders didn’t come off looking like a psychopath. Hell even the looney Trump delegates didn’t come off that way. Only the people who are already psychopaths get duped into being exposed as much. The real reason this happens is that the “trickery” on the part of Baron Cohen made these people…

Good call.  Especially with that ridiculous mascot Denny’s tried to put out that looked like the restaurant version of Mr. Hankey from South Park.  a walking turd should also be Trump’s campaign mascot.

Definitely all true.  For me, I haven’t once thought it was worthwhile to try and convert any of them with rational conversation.  Since day one, I go right to the “he’s a huge pussy, and by extension so are you” angle.  There’s no discussion to be had with these basement-dwelling mouth-breathers.  You just have to…

Great call.

that’s been my first go-to as well.  I love to call them Beta Cupcakes.  

Yep.  I’m just waiting for Tank Girl to show up.

Don’t I know it.  I had a Raiders one around that same timeframe.  Thanks to Bo Jackson and N.W.A. of course.

They already know that, since the vast majority of these right-wing idiots are also weak little pussies.  It’s why they push their bullshit so hard.  These fools are practically afraid of their own shadows.

It’s probably encased in two decades of fromunda cheese.

written in truck-stop kids menu crayons.

and why do his fucking lips look permanently like a fucking prolapsed sphincter?

the same person who dyes twelve grey hairs yellow, grows them 45 feet long, and then swirls them on top of his head like fake spaghetti dumped on a contestant during a Double Dare challenge.

Every time I see someone wearing them they look like the worst Stranger Things superfan EVER.  I honestly didn’t know anybody even still manufactured those foam, no-seam-in-the-front snapback pieces of shit until the Mandarin Moron started his awful candidacy.  I’m surpised he isn’t also marketing MAGA Starter jackets…

Bob Nutting makes a strong run at Angelos though. And at least Angelos is nearly dead. Nutting is only 56, and will probably live to 150 just to ensure I and my kids spend our entire life with the Pirates never even sniffing a World Series (fuck you again Francisco Cabrera). He’s such a piece of shit that he turned…

Well, reality itself has a liberal bias, so I’d say yes.  The reason for this is that conservative ideology has been a proven failure for the last 40 years if one were to actually look at it objectively.  But they’ve successfully hoodwinked people over that entire time frame by playing on the fears and bigotry of…

Everybody is missing the real reason Putin loves Trump: with those tiny toddler hands it makes Vlad’s little pimple dick look bigger when Trump is constantly giving him hand jobs.