Greitens was in the Peace Corps and he was a Navy SEAL. He has been a huge disappointment thus far, but I’m still holding a sliver of hope he doesn’t cross fully into Pence territory.

Damn it, I had high hopes for Greitens after reading his book a few years ago. I knew he’d go into politics, but I was hoping he wouldn’t be a useless fucking tool.

I’d love to see someone challenge Trump to walk a mile in under 20 minutes.

Not trying to be a dick, but why not? Is there an official policy in place that explicitly says they can’t just be like “Fuck you, you figure it out”?

This is worth getting mad about. What Bill Maher said was not.

If they want to forgive him, it’s their forgiveness to give

Behold the power and the glory

Random story: At the height of the renaming anything French craze (freedom fries, etc.), we were sitting in the cafeteria at my university when one of my friends sat down with a plate of french toast. Another of my friends stood up, smashed both his fists down on the table loudly, pointed at him and screamed in a…

Did anyone else think it was Danzig?

When you’re a dumb ugly mother fucker, you take consolation wherever you can find it, and one way is to proclaim yourself a member of the master race. Take this moronic looking dipshit as an example

I’ve always believed that they shouldn’t show the actual picture of these guys, just put their full name under a picture of literal gaping asshole on the news. That might discourage some of this shit, and if you ask me, it’s far less offensive than looking at their goddamn face everywhere for a month straight.

They got the guy in Mississippi alive even after he killed a cop, so if you and everyone else who feels obligated to chime in with this comment no matter what the circumstances could shut the fuck up, that would be great.

Seriously though, what if a foreign leader started to do a handshake, but then went for a little sack tap instead?

American *dumbasses, some of us respected France for telling Bush II to fuck himself. BUT, I will admit, I had some fun with the French jokes anyway

What do you think would have happened if the PM he shoved would have given him a little sack tap in return?

Legit question, what happens if the Prime Minister of Montenegro simply decides he’s not having that shit, and bag tags the President of the United States? Nothing too violent, just like a half-power slap to the nuts of the leader of the free world as a reminder that all the titles in the world don’t make Donnie any…

He’s so fucking fat and dumpy he can barely cross his arms.

My wife took an offensive driving course as part of her law enforcement training. After that, she spent six years navigating DC traffic. Before any of that even happened, our friends used to call her Bullet because of the way she drove. When I’m with her and she’s driving, I usually close my eyes and think about the…

So Deadspin’s only coverage of a women’s basketball team capping off a perfect season with their fourth championship in a row is to post a tweet by a convicted rapist. What the fuck were you thinking?